Category Archives: Money Hump Building

June 17, 2010 · 9:03 pm

Love & Loathe — 06/17/10

Loathe:

* My irrigation timer’s battery died… again. So I’ve been going out in the morning and manually turning it on for a minute or so. It’s so peaceful out there and I enjoy the stillness before the day begins. Not this morning, though. The entire time I was out there, Tug mournfully meowed at me from inside the cat run. Perpetual meowing is not peaceful.

* I cannot wait to be done with our current dishwasher detergent. I promise to never stray again from Cascade detergent. No matter how inexpensive the lure of the other bottles.
These plates are glass and are supposed to be, you know, clear …

These are knives, believe it or not, and are supposed to be shiny…

I will never buy this again…

Love:

* Steamed artichokes.

* In support of the Lakers, I’ve declared this week The Week of Purple. I’ve worn a shade of purple every day, even purple jammies (JAMMIES!!). Also, Grace inspired me to paint my nails purple.

* Ummm, Lakers… 2010 Champions! We’ve had some pretty good neighborhood rivalry going on, which has totally cracked me up. Tonight, the neighbors who’ve been cheering for the Celtics played like it was Halloween night with no candy. They turned off all their lights, like no one was home. But we know they’re there. HA! Hilarious!

* A couple nights ago, it was around midnight and I heard a bunch of strange sounds coming from outside. I crept toward the door, grabbed my camera and recorded these sounds… a night bird? I’ve never heard anything like it. I stood in marvel as I listened to the incredible range of singing I heard. (Click to hear.)

* While out there listening to the night bird, I smelled an unbelievably pleasant scent. I sniffed and sniffed, and then realized that my lily plant had bloomed. What an unexpected thrill!

* I finally got the gumption up to discontinue our home phone line. Except the guy talked me into keeping it for $5 a month. He called it a limited line, 60 outgoing minutes per month. I think I’m OK with that, because I have it hooked up to our fax machine anyway, so any incoming calls get the SQUEAL. I love that I got up the gumption to make a change that’s good for our budget.

One Last Thing:

I finally got it. The offer of employment.

… and, best of all, they were fair to me. In these economic times, that tells me they really like me. I accepted their offer. Starting Monday, 6/21, I’m officially their employee.

Which means I get the 4th of July as a paid holiday! And sick time! And super inexpensive benefits! And vacation time! Yay! Oh, and a job.

25 Comments

Filed under Love/Loathe, Money Hump Building

April 22, 2010 · 8:43 pm

Love & Loathe — 04/22/10

Loathe:

* Having a sore jaw after a dental cleaning. Never used to have post-cleaning jaw pain until after the dentist yanked and pulled and yanked a wisdom tooth out six years ago. Which is why you should always have a specialist do those types of surgeries, I’m thinking.

* When I spend my lunch time driving to a store to purchase something after having researched it online, only to learn that the product is only available online. It should have said so on their website! If I should choose to order it, I’d have to either pay shipping, or spend $50 to get free shipping. Oh, I think not! I will go to your competitor and buy it and NOT pay shipping.

Love:

* In the past week, I’ve had extreme swimming weather. Saturday and Sunday I had my first “under the sun” swimming of the year, and then Wednesday evening I had “swimming in the rain” weather. Both are all kinds of awesomeness, as far as I’m concerned and makes for a very happy Jammie J.

* Francine Rivers. She’s the author of the Mark of the Lion series I wrote about in last week’s post. I’ve now read another of her other books, and got another one in the mail which I can’t wait to start reading. I love how well-researched her books are and well-developed her characters are. Such a thrill to read quality books.

* Bringing laughter and joy to the lives of the people I work with. I love feeling like I’m making a difference to their lives.

* Getting “real” mail in my mail box. In this virtual world we all seem to have embraced, getting a real piece of mail is a nice reminder that people do still know how to put pen to paper.

One Last Thing:

Lately I’ve felt so quiet inside. Not surprising, I suppose, given how much noise has been clamoring inside of my head so far this year. All the teeter-tottering emotions of fearing a miscarriage and, conversely, trying to accept that whatever will be, will be.

And then the miscarriage happened… and when I finally had Miracle, it was as if I instantaneously felt … empty.

Empty and quiet. It was over. Irrevocable. No other outcome was possible.

And now I feel quiet. It’s not depression or sadness, not really. it’s more of a re-alignment of perspective. Ecclesiastes is one of my favorite books in the Bible, some say that King Solomon was depressed when he wrote it, but I personally feel as if he realized that the routine of our days and the focus on minutiae is all overly-dramatic and can be all-consuming, if we let it. Details and routines need to get done, but when it all comes to an end, what we’ve worked on for our souls, our spirituality, is what really matters.

And for now, life continues. My boss gave me an effusive thank you for helping him get organized. The details and minutiae of his job had overrun his office, and I helped him tame it… an ongoing project, to be sure, but the thank you made me smile inside all the way home. Even while stuck in traffic.

21 Comments

Filed under Kid Quest, Love/Loathe, Money Hump Building

March 29, 2010 · 10:47 pm

Peering Through Pain.

Tony is a little amazed that I just seem to keep going, pain or not. He says most people would just stay home… I suppose he’s right. But the thing is, I learned a long time ago that if I let pain control my life, then pain becomes my life. I’d rather have a life and deal with pain, than to isolate myself because of my fear of pain, or fear of showing others my pain.

As with most life altering things, I’m learning that having a miscarriage is one of those things that silently twines itself around the daily happenings of a person’s life. Of my life. It’s weird, because it’s like this quiet grief of which no one ever speaks. No one I meet on the street has any idea that at the moment I’m telling them “I’m fine,” in response to their standard greeting of, “How are you?” I’m actually losing a life I’ve nourished for 2 1/2 months, and a dream for which we’ve prayed for 3 years.

Today would have marked the beginning of my 2nd trimester.

The dreams are hard, and I’ve awakened more than once the past few days because I’ve been crying in my sleep. ~~ I felt like I’d been punched in the gut the other day when I saw a woman holding her newborn close to her cheek. ~~ I wanted to punch someone in the gut when, within the first five minutes of meeting him and his obviously pregnant wife, he made more than three comments about his wife being pregnant.

Irritable. Sad. Sensitive. Tired. Impatient. Cramps. Bleeding.

Yet, despite the pain — emotional and physical — I’ve been able to carry on a semblance of a normal life. I’m able to go to work, learn new things and practice my craft as an assistant. The people I work with are cool and hip. There are fun perks at this company, like free breakfasts every Friday, sponsored by the company.

Tony and I were able to have a great weekend together. Friday night, we went up to the local mountains and, Saturday morning, visited our friends (the cook & waitresses) at our favorite breakfast restaurant up there. Which also means we’ll think of them and our time up there for most of the week, because we have breakfast leftovers.

We drove down Saturday afternoon to attend a Honda-sponsored dinner event for the people who rode on their float in the Rose Parade. A dinner at a ritzy steakhouse, with appetizers, salad, main course (filet mignon for us, please) and dessert. The representative from Honda said they’d stayed away from having riders on their floats in years past, but now might reconsider that policy in the future because all the float riders this year were so wonderful. As a thank you, beyond the experience, memories and dinner, they gave all the float riders photo albums and DVDs. I continue to be so impressed with Honda corporation.

This weekend was also Marigold’s birthday and the Steve/Marigold/Huck/Milo Show invited us to join them at Disneyland. Our schedules meshed up, so we spent the afternoon at the happiest place on earth, riding kiddie rides with the kiddies and getting our picture taken with Mickey Mouse.

The best ride of the day was the Jungle Cruise, because I got this picture of nephew Huck just after we saw the hippopotamuses get “shot at” by our guide. He wasn’t pleased.

Grateful. Blessed. Loved. Grace. Amazed. Miracles.

22 Comments

Filed under Best Husband, Entertainment can be Cheap, Health/Endo, I did something Special, I feel Sad, I have Family, I Left Home for Awhile, Kid Quest, Money Hump Building, Sometimes I Dream

March 22, 2010 · 10:12 pm

Physical Processing.

I went for my second opinion on Friday. The news was really a moot point. I knew what it would be, for I had started bleeding last Wednesday.

Mostly, I just wanted one last picture of our baby.

It amuses me the lengths to which the medical community goes to avoid calling our baby a “baby.” Each visit, I wonder what term the doctor will come up with. This time, it was “results of conception.” Clever, very clever. For isn’t that what each of us is?

So, my body started cramping on Saturday afternoon and took a turn for the intense side of things on Sunday afternoon in its attempt to “pass the results of conception.” (“Passing” sounds so easy, doesn’t it?)

Throughout the process of physical pain and inconvenience, I was simply amazed at the sheer amount of insulation my body had provided to protect this little one. And then, by last night, the intense pain was all gone and left me feeling tender and fragile inside.

I felt well enough to continue with life as usual. In my capacity of “normal.”

Which is why I was unpleasantly surprised when a contraction hit with such force this afternoon, it took me to my knees at work, and then my boss walked by. Oh Lord, I was so embarrassed but unable to do anything except remember to breathe. Now I find myself wondering if I’ll lose my job on top of our baby. (sigh)

I couldn’t go home because I couldn’t sit, and even if I could have sat down, it was horrifying to imagine myself driving in rush hour traffic with that kind of pain. I couldn’t figure out why the pain was so much worse today than yesterday (although not kidney stone passing kind of pain). The only thing I could think is it’s maybe like when you vomit? It’s less painful if you have water or something in your stomach? Maybe that’s why the pain was so much worse today, because there really wasn’t that much left in there to wring out? I’m grasping at illogical logic here. Indulge me, please, I’m hormonal.

Really, though, emotionally, I’m OK. Sad, of course, but it’s as if the physical process is a tangible culmination of the emotional pain I’ve had since mid-February. At this point, I simply want my body to correctly finish what it’s supposed to do, as I do not want surgical intervention. Which is also why I don’t want to ask my doctor about this process, because how many women do they actually “allow” to miscarry naturally? They’re surgeons, every one of them, and all surgeons want to do is poke, prod and do surgery. I just have no idea how long the cramping is supposed to last… or why it waited 24 hours before coming back with such force.

I’m just praying for the grace to get through each day and that my body will do what it needs to do correctly. But, God, this hurts, and I won’t have a baby in my arms to show for it when it’s all done. And that, frankly, just sucks.

32 Comments

Filed under I feel Sad, Kid Quest, Money Hump Building

March 8, 2010 · 11:39 pm

First Day.

Whew. I’m here to tell you that I’m tired. Or as I used to say when I was a little girl with a southern accent, “I’s tiiiired.”

It’s been awhile since I’ve used my brain AND stayed in an upright sitting position for a full day. Now that’s multi-tasking, right there.

Seriously, though, as far as I’m concerned, the first day went well and no one told me otherwise. I’m thinkin’ that’s a good thing, yes? There’s a lot for me to take in, a lot to learn. The typical learning curve of who’s who and who does what, as well as learning about an industry that I’ve not worked in before. I just need to be patient with myself and hope that they’ll see that I do have lights on in my head and that I am making the connections. There’s also the part where I’m used to being the person to whom questions are referred, and it’s a little odd to have the roles reversed.

I had quite the adventure getting to work today. I was told to report to work at 9, and I was all set to get there a bit earlier than that. Mostly because I wanted to avoid traffic. As it turned out, my “early” goal turned into an “on time” target, because there was a minor glitch with the cat’s litter boxes and, since they’re in the garage, those things are the last view I have of our home before I leave. Which means if there’s something wrong with them, I don’t see it until I’m literally getting in my car.

I left the top down on my car since rain wasn’t in the forecast. Well, wouldn’t you know it, I got in the middle of traffic AND a torrential downpour of rain. I kept adjusting the brim of my hat and muttering to myself, “Come ON, people! 35 miles per hour, that’s all I ask of you…” (35 MPH is the magic speed that aerodynamics kick in and send the rain over my car’s cockpit.) I swear, it must have looked like a movie set, because what are the chances the rain and traffic hit at the same spot on the freeway. Then when traffic cleared up, so did the rain. *shrugs shoulder* I guess a little rain never hurt nobody.

Beef stew in the crock pot for dinner, a few nice hours with my husband this evening, and I’m ready to call it a perfect day. Here’s hoping the rest of the week goes just as well.

One day at a time…

33 Comments

Filed under I ♥ My Miata, I Left Home for Awhile, Money Hump Building

March 4, 2010 · 10:19 pm

Love & Loathe — 03/04/10

Loathe:

* Websites who make you change your password because they changed their security protocol. I was fine with my password, it was long enough with enough weird characters in it, and now I have to remember yet another version of my weird characterized password.

Love:

* Brach’s Sugar Free Cinnamon Hard Candy. Now, I just have to figure out where I bought them in the first place. Because they’re gone.

* This tag on my hair dryer. The irony of where I keep it makes me smirk every time I see it. That’s me, living on the edge of danger!

* Dark Sipping Chocolate. The Steve/Marigold/Huck/Milo Show gave it to me as part of my multi-part birthday present last year. I just finished it and it was delicious. I might just lick the inside of the canister (which I also love — it’s SQUARE!) Who knew I would like something from Trader Joe’s?

* When my husband finds the Arrowhead water bottles that have the bigger cap. Often times it’s the smaller things in life that makes me happy, but in this instance, it’s definitely the bigger thing (small though it may be).

* I busted out of my voluntary introverted isolation today and spent a couple hours (maybe longer?) with my friend, Grace. It did me a wealth of good and I just *heart* her so much.

* When the sun breaks through the clouds.

One Last Thing:

I had two phone interviews (last Thursday and Tuesday this week) and in-person interviews with five people (yesterday and today), for a contract-to-hire position.

The recruiter I’m working with has been working with this company for 14 years and she is confident that they’re an honorable company. I hope she’s right.

In an “It’s a Small World” scenario, this recruiter has ties to the Rose Parade and I saw her in the Rose Parade (this year, and probably other years, too) and didn’t even know it. Her story is absolutely incredible and when I met with her today for the first time, and then learned of her connection, I found myself shaking my head inside over the incredible strength this woman possesses.

Anyway, I landed the job** and at a wage that’s just a smidge lower than I wanted, but at least I’m not placed in the dark corner of the clearance aisle anymore with a neon pink “50% OFF” price tag on my forehead. I start on Monday. There’s a lot of work to be done there and they really, really need someone like me. I’m terrified, but in a good way.

Can I get a “WOO HOO!” from My People?

**… just when I was prepared to spend another 12 months sitting on my duff eating chocolate!

28 Comments

Filed under Love/Loathe, Money Hump Building

March 1, 2010 · 4:07 pm

Weekend Worry Warts.

I resolved my question about extended EDD benefits with a quick phone call to their 800 number today. I was greeted with a recording which informed me that they were receiving higher call volume than normal and that if my regular benefits are running out, they will automatically include an extension form request with my last check.

Yay! That was the easiest piece of work I had to do all week!

Next on my List of Worries is my mortgage. In July it converts to an ARM, which I was planning to refinance before then. But to refinance, you kind of need to have a job… and a house that is valued about the same as it was when you bought it. Strike one and strike two. Too bad my mortgage isn’t with Chase, because if it were, I would have had ample opportunity to discuss it with them in February when they were calling me 6 times a day hoping that the Trudeau’s would magically answer my phone. All that phone calling has tapered off, by the way. Thank goodness.

We won’t even talk about filing TAXES or the next property TAX assessment, both of which are rapidly coming due next month.

Instead, I’ll tell you I had my nose buried for a few hours yesterday in a book written by Kimberley Woodhouse, entitled Woodhouse Family Welcome Home! It was a much needed reminder to me that no matter what challenges, obstacles or fears I’m facing, to keep searching for my joy in the midst of it. That He has bigger shoulders than I’ll ever have, and that’s where my worries and fears (and praise and worship) really belong.

I reminded myself of that while I battled with my Sunday Night Insomnia last night.

If you’ve never heard about the Woodhouse Family, I encourage you to read their story. The book was an easy and quick read, and I really enjoyed it. If you want my book, I’m happy to pass it along. I won it in an online comment contest, so I’d be glad to continue its journey. We can do a drawing or something if more than one of you wants it.

18 Comments

Filed under I own a Home, Money Hump Building, Sometimes Thinking Exhausts Me, Spirituality

February 27, 2010 · 2:47 pm

Ownership of Human.

On Thursday night, we were relaxing and watching a movie or something. Maybe a Lakers game. Tony looked over at me and rolled his eyes and started laughing. Not at me, but at what was stretched on the lower half of me.

Look for yourself.

Have you ever seen anything so ridiculous?

LOOK at that, from my hips to my ankles, Tug is like a 30″ long heated blanket.

Relaxed or just really happy, or both. That cat spent all day trying to get on my lap. Meowing when I dared to get up and walk around or *gasp* leave the house to run errands. Oh my!

Here’s a closer view… look at that paw of his, all stretched out.

Right now, this moment, he’s on my lap with his head awkwardly perched in the crook of my elbow while I’m typing. Dude’s got some serious possessiveness going on these days. He’s gonna freak when I go back to work.

Speaking of which, my six months of unemployment pay is running out in a couple weeks. I can’t believe it’s been six months since my position was eliminated. That boggles my mind. I’m guessing there’s some sort of extension or something that I can get, since I can’t seem to get a job? I mean, hell, I had a half price sale on me and I still didn’t land the job. Sheez. I can’t seem to find anything about how to apply for the extension on California’s EDD website and everything in the news about unemployment is all about the extended benefits for the 1.2 million who are unemployed that is running out this weekend. Which I don’t think applies to me, not yet anyway.

That’s been the worry gnawing on my mind for the last couple of days, and Tug’s been doing his very best to squash it with all of his warm fur and neediness and charm me into staying home with him.

20 Comments

Filed under Kid Substitutes, Money Hump Building

February 25, 2010 · 4:03 pm

Love & Loathe — 02/25/10

Loathe:

* I had forgotten about these sinus headaches I get when storms move through. I probably forgot because we don’t get that many storms here in California, but this time of year we do. Sometimes. I would be one big walking headache if I lived anywhere else, huh?

Love:

* Honey sticks. I’ve been on a tea with honey kick lately. Could have something to do with my half sore throat, which may be a teensy tiny sinus infection. Or something to do with my sinuses (see first loathe up there). But, yeah, honey sticks. Yum.

* The Mess. That is what I order at the restaurant we go to in the mountains. It has eggs, hash browns, ham, onions, tomatoes, mushrooms, jalapenos and probably a few things I’m forgetting right now. I put my hot sauce on it and it’s absolutely delicious. Plus, it’s enough food that I make four or five breakfasts out of it. Delicious and thrifty!

* Opening the windows and watching the cats scramble to get up on the window ledge. I love seeing feline bliss.

One Last Thing:

So, I had my interview yesterday and I got the call today that they decided to hire the candidate who had 6 years of experience in their type of business.

Their decision is actually a HUGE relief to me, because if they had offered the job to me, I couldn’t have turned it down, since I need one. But after I processed yesterday’s interview, I honestly think I would have hated working there (or the PC way of saying it, “I didn’t feel like we were a good match”), which absolutely surprised me given how excited I was about the interview.

The HR person said it wasn’t me, they believed I was “an excellent candidate” and am “a very talented young lady with a lot of skills,” and that my “resume is incredible,” they just wanted someone who already had experience in that industry. Since I hate nothing more than wasting my time, I was grateful when she offered me a couple of critiques about my responses yesterday during the course of the conversation today.

I feel like at least I learned something from the experience, which I can use going forward. For me, that’s what this whole process is about. That and finding a job, of course.

12 Comments

Filed under Love/Loathe, Money Hump Building

January 28, 2010 · 1:32 pm

Love & Loathe — 01/28/10

Loathe:

* The way the house smells like ashes when it rains. Downdraft in the chimney, I guess, don’t like it.

* The wet dog smell in the garage when it rains. It’s been nearly 5 years and the previous owner’s legacy lives on in the garage for some reason.

* I found some notes I had written when in high school and I realized that typing has caused me to lose my lovely penmanship, because now I’m apparently used to “writing” at high speeds. Slowing down and actually penning things with a real pen might be a good thing to do sometimes.

Love:

* McDonald’s hot fudge sundaes. It’s the simple things, My People, and they must use fake milk or something, because I have nooooo problem digesting them.

* My warm rice bag thing that I heat up in the microwave. Good for all ailments, from lady problems to muscle strains, it’s an all-around wonderful thing.

* My scanner. I have two of them, actually, and have primarily been using my HP for the last year. But I recently installed the software for my Canon LiDE 600F flatbed scanner on my Toshiba laptop (remember my other laptop went bad a few months back). I had forgotten how well put together this flatbed scanner is and, while not the fastest thing out there, it’s got some really nice, well thought-out features.

* The six baby guppies born yesterday morning. They’re so cute, swimming around with their itty-bitty eyes looking at things, eating microscopic food and pooping microscopic poop.

* This plant… I can’t remember its name and I always forget that it’s a winter bloomer, but it doesn’t forget. January comes around and it spills over the fence with profuse flowers, in shades of blue, periwinkle and lavender. It makes me happy to look at it.