Our Anniversary.

It’s been four years since we trekked to the mountains and then hiked a mile, with a little rock climbing thrown in at the end, to get married in the place where he proposed to me. It was a unique wedding, to say the least, and it was perfect for us.

At the time, I didn’t feel ready to be married … I was scared, I was overwhelmed, I still had healing to do, I was still carrying emotional baggage. I thought I had to be in the perfect place emotionally, physically and at the perfect time in my life — like getting on a ship. If the anchor wasn’t cast to hold things in place, and the loading ramp wasn’t lined up perfectly, then I’d end up adrift in the ocean.

But then I realized, marriage isn’t like a boat ride… in a good marriage, you aren’t tethered to shore or anchored to the bottom of the sea. Marriage is like a hike. Sometimes the path is carved out of granite and the going is dry, tough and not very pretty. Other times, there are waterfalls and shady areas that take your breath away for the sheer beauty and spirituality. When you get tired along the way, you have someone to hold your hand or cradle your head while you rest. You don’t have to be perfect to get married, you just have to be strong enough to be “weak” — willing to be vulnerable, to let him into the inner core, to let him help you heal. You should have the freedom to choose which path you take, as long as you always end up back together, facing the same direction. Facing life together, with family and friends surrounding you in love.

Marrying this man is like a little slice of heaven pie each day for me. There is so much more to him than I would have ever guessed when we first met and every day I love getting to know him just a little more. There are so many of his virtues I could extol, but I really don’t want people throwing up just because they read my anniversary post on my blog.

So, I’ll just finish by saying that when I look at couples who have been married 20+ years, I know that four years seems like a piece of sand on the beach — there’s a whole lot more sand to cover. But then I think about all we’ve done together and, boy, have we made every single piece of sand in our marriage count so far. We are really good at making memories that last.

Happy Anniversary, babe.

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16 Comments

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16 responses to “Our Anniversary.

  1. Happy Anniversary! You’re so right. You were not mentally prepared at all. You guys didn’t even live together until about a month later! I’m so glad you got used to the idea and became relaxed enought to let Tony fully into your life. I think we can all tell that you guys are really in love and have a great marriage. Keep on keeping on!

    ~~~~~~
    Nope, didn’t even live together. Didn’t need to… my fears & healing weren’t the kind that living together would have fixed. Therapy, blogging, and lots of heart-to-heart conversations, now… that’s another story. πŸ™‚

    Thanks… πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  2. Caryl

    Happy, Happy, Happy Anniversary. You still have the card I left with you, don’t you?
    Love you both,

    ~~~~~~
    Thanks… and yes, we do.
    Love you, too. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  3. That’s a wonderful analogy of marriage. As one of those 20+ year people, I can certainly say marriage is a journey and you don’t always know where it’s going to lead. Certainly if you’d asked me 16 years ago when I was in your shoes, I would have never thought I’d be where I am. You two are very lucky to have each other. Happy Anniversary and may you treasure every moment together for a long number of years to come.

    BTW, your hair was so short then!

    ~~~~~~
    Thanks, Vince, really appreciate your words of wisdom.

    … and I thought my hair was so long at the time. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  4. Cat

    Happy anniversary! I’m all teary-eyed from this post. I remember looking at these photos 4 years ago and thinking “they are so happy and in love!” And that you had a fun, simple wedding the way you wanted it. Just reading you all these years (with an unexpected break) and I know how much you and Tony are meant to be and how in love you are. And I get the posts where you write about how much you make each other laugh – I have the same thing in Shawn.

    All the best for many, many more wonderful years together!

    ~~~~~~
    Awww, you made ME teary-eyed with your comment. πŸ™‚
    Sometimes there’s only one person in the world who really *gets* you and when you find him, your life feels like Christmas every day. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  5. tony

    Happy Anniversary Sweetie :mrgreen:
    πŸ™‚

    ~~~~~~
    xoxo
    ~Jammie J.

  6. tony

    Happy Anniversary Sweetie Pie :mrgreen:
    πŸ™‚

    ~~~~~~
    Love you so much. xo

    ~Jammie J.

  7. grrrace

    Happy, happy, happy, happy anniversary! πŸ™‚

    My eyes are all watery thinking about that day. Just like in that pic of me up there. πŸ˜› hehe.

    *muwah*

    xoxoxox

    ~~~~~~
    Thanks, love, did you know that’s one of my fav pics of you of all time. hehe
    Your husband did a fine job of capturing the moments that day, we are forever indebted to him. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  8. Just perfect. Happy Anniversary Y’all!!

    ~~~~~~
    Thanks, honey. xo

    ~Jammie J.

  9. What a BEAUTIFUL Post, dear Jammie…A VERY HAPPY HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to you and your dear Tony….I love how you expressed your feelings so wonderfully in what you wrote……No throwing up from this corner! Just a big warm hug to you both!

    ~~~~~~
    Oh good, so glad I didn’t make you throw up! πŸ™‚
    I’ll take the warm hug. Always. πŸ˜€

    ~Jammie J.

  10. CONGRATS!!!!
    sounds like you have had such a blessed time growing and maturing together …
    i remember the nuptuals just as if i were there too!
    big ((hugs)) to both of you! love ya!

    ~~~~~~
    I think you had dial-up Internet service at the time, didn’t you? Man, how times have changed!
    Thanks, Saija, I love your hugs… and you. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  11. Happy belated anniversary! Wow, I can’t believe it’s been four years already. I remember when you first shared the pictures (or was it a video?) with us—seems like just yesterday. I enjoyed your post…. may you have a million more happy years together! πŸ™‚ Hugs, Debra

    ~~~~~~
    Awww, thanks! πŸ™‚ Yep, I did pictures and video… it does seem like just yesterday, doesn’t it? πŸ™‚ Ohhhh, a million. Wonder if we can be married in Heaven, because I sure don’t want to be flappin’ a million year old body around down here on earth!

    ~Jammie J.

  12. Beth

    Wow, I’ve been reading your blog for more than four years?? πŸ˜€

    But I remember reading about your wedding and how happy I was for you two! You are really blessed to have each other and I know you’ll be celebrating your anniversary for decades to come!

    ~~~~~~
    Yes, we’ve been blog friends for more than four years. Can you believe that? πŸ™‚
    Thanks for the happy wishes. πŸ™‚
    ~Jammie J.

  13. WOW! Four years already? HAPPY ANNIVERSARY you 2! πŸ˜€ And think! You got off to a really “rocky” start! Did you have your climbing shoes on? πŸ˜‰

    ~~~~~~
    Four fur and fun-filled years. πŸ˜†
    Yep, I wore my hiking boots with my wedding dress. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  14. Why is it everytime I read the headline the “happy, happy birthDAY” chant that restaurants use come to mind? geez my mind is strange.

    Happy Anniversay like a week late. 😦

    ~~~~~~
    Your mind is strange? It’s why I love you so much. πŸ™‚

    Thanks for the Happy Anniversary wishes. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  15. Oh – we’re about to hit 32 – hope you continue to want to stay married to that guy

    ^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
    I’ve no plans for changing things. He’ll have to pry me away with a crowbar to get rid of me. πŸ™‚

    ~Jammie J.

  16. Redfred

    4 years ???????????? really? WOW!!!!

    Very happy anniversary

    ^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
    4 years… hard to believe. πŸ™‚
    Thanks!
    ~Jammie J.