Monthly Archives: May 2012

Driving Home.

When the work day ends, we all have our commute to get home to our family. I always wonder, if I happen to look beyond the car to the person within, what their story is. Why is that person angry? Why is that person driving like a jerk? Why did that person act like he didn’t know he had to turn left? Didn’t she know that was her exit from the freeway? The commute for me is usually the same every day, but oddly I rarely feel as if I see the same people every day.

My commute home starts with backing out of the parking lot at work. I am so serious!

I smile when I see the seat cover on my passenger seat, though.

My father-in-law said that our house looks like a baby lives there now, and he’s right, it does.  I’m not a huge fan of primary colored toys, but there are some points to having a child that is just cool.  Cars is cool.

The FedEx plane loads its time sensitive cargo…

Then I pass this restaurant that always has amazing smells … pasta, steak… emanating from it and what I smell from there will sometimes influence my decision of what I have for dinner.

Then I wait in this line…

To get the honor of waiting in some more traffic…

Then traffic usually lightens a little bit…

From this point I’m about 8 to 10 minutes from my home and I usually sigh a little in relief.  The freeway part of it is over now.

Almost there…

Usually a combination of two, or sometimes three, of the people I love most in the world are waiting for me when I get home… the day I took this picture it was my mom and my son.  Other times it’s my husband and my son.  Sometimes it’s all three.

…and sometimes, which is why I never slam the garage door when I come in the house, this is what greets me:

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Filed under Best Husband, I have Family, Our Kid is Cute

Mother’s Day

Last year on this day I intentionally spent the day alone, avoiding people, because I was two months pregnant and afraid that I wouldn’t make it to the end of the pregnancy with a living baby.  I didn’t want to be wished a happy mother’s day, because I didn’t feel like a mother.  I felt like a fraud.

It’s a weird place to be, when you’ve had a miscarriage and have struggled with infertility, it steals the joy that hope offers for a miracle.  You learn not to expect anything, that way if it doesn’t become a reality, you’re not overly disappointed.  Or at least that’s what I told myself.

This year I am sensitive to the fact that there may be women out there who in their heart are already a mother but they may not have the baby that their heart dreams of holding.  I wish I could make every mother’s dream come true.  I wish every mother could be as happy as I am.

Even on my worst day when I’m at my wits end, which honestly doesn’t happen that often, it’s the best day of my life because this world is where William lives.  I hear his laugh, his squeals, even his screams of joy.  I see his smiles, I feel his super soft, chubby skin, I stroke his hair, I feel him nursing… and even with all that, I can still hardly believe that I get to actually hold every day and night in my arms the tangible result of the dreams of my heart.

Happy Mother’s Day.

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Filed under I feel Glad, I feel Hope, Our Kid is Cute

Wordless Wednesday. Ladybugs = Good Luck.

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Filed under Our Kid is Cute, Wordless (mostly) Post