Category Archives: Sometimes I Sleep

Crazy Drivers.

I had a wonderful night’s sleep and felt so relaxed this morning. William woke on his own, and at the perfect time, so we had some wonderful, sweet time together this morning. As I pulled out of the garage and drove down the hill, I debated what music I wanted to hear. I have a love/hate relationship with worship music in the car, it’s a constant battle for me to sing along with worship music while driving in the midst of frustrating traffic, but this morning I felt really positive that I could do it!

I merged onto the freeway and was pleased that I managed to do so without inconveniencing anyone. I merged onto the 405 and then, from a mile behind, someone who had taken the truck bypass lane off the 5 rapidly came up behind me and tailgated me. I ignored him, because most people, when they come off that merge lane choose to go over to the fast lane. My strategy is to stay in the slow lane and merge gradually when the lane ends. So I figured he’d move on in a minute or two.

This guy didn’t do that. He stayed on my tail, and when the slow lane started to slow, he THEN swerved rapidly to the left, to the fast lane, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

I tracked him with my eyes, just a little concerned. He wasn’t hard to miss, since he was tailgating and weaving. I just followed my usual pattern of driving, this lane here, that lane there, I stayed in the slow lane, merging where I needed to, etc., but for the most part just “holding my lane.” Leaving appropriate “heavy traffic” space between cars as usual, just enough for me to be comfortable. Heavy traffic drivers know it’s a fine art of just how much space you can leave without pissing off everyone behind you because you don’t want the entire county to merge in front of you. But I’m always careful to let people in if need be, so they can get over to the car pool lane, etc. Just doing my usual drive. My pattern is a good one, I know this… I’ve been doing this drive since 2009 and my pattern has been proven over and over again, because I’ll usually pick a car or two in other lanes and “track” them. On a normal day, my pattern usually puts me quite a few cars ahead of the ones I’m tracking.

My pattern bore out again today, because despite this guy’s weaving and tailgating, from the fast lane back over to the slow lane, back and forth he went, he wasn’t able to get in front of me. Apparently, I was his car that he was “tracking” and it was pissing him right off. There was one instance that I refused to let him in front of me, I had let someone merge who had just gotten on the freeway, and it was apparent that they were trying to get over to the car pool lane. Now, the thing is, that merging lane is approximately 1 mile, maybe 1.5 miles long. It serves as a major freeway merge on ramp, as well as a major street’s off ramp, 500 feet after the street’s exit lane, the merge lane ends. My experience tells me that the only reason people urgently move over is because they’re trying to get into the car pool lane, because the car pool opening ends mid-point, and people (if they’re trying to get into the car pool lane) have to cross 5 or 6 lanes of cars to get there. For the most part, though, people just be-bop along in that merge lane and then merge like a zipper when it ends. Easy peasy.

After seeing me let a car pool merger in, the Fool decided that he was going to be opportunistic and rapidly “jumped out” into the merge lane, and then attempted to “merge” back in, right into my passenger door! It was at that point I realized, for whatever reason, he had it in for me… because, as mentioned, he could have easily just be-bopped along for another mile and merged back in, but he wanted in front of ME. Since he wasn’t merging into an open space, but rather into my passenger door, I didn’t want to brake abruptly (not sure that would have helped in this instance anyway) and I am rather fond of my passenger door, so, I attempted to change lanes to let him have my spot, but someone was next to me, so I blared my horn at the Fool. He apparently wasn’t expecting really loud air horns to be part of my tiny car, because he backed off and went back behind me.

I was able to safely change lanes a couple seconds after that, intending to let the Fool have my spot, but he followed my lane change. And then from that point on, he copied every single lane change I made and left about 3 inches of room between my rear bumper and his front bumper. To compensate for that (since I’m rather fond of my rear bumper), I left a bit more space in front of me in case traffic were to stop rapidly (which it does in the lane I (we?) was in at that part of the freeway). I was not using my brakes, but rather my engine/stick shift to adjust my speed. I’m sure he thought I was leaving extra space with the sole intent to piss him off, but I wasn’t. When traffic opened up, he zipped into the lane next to me and cut in front of me (despite ample room in both lanes, he just had to make his point), and crammed on his brakes. In his impulsive move, he actually left a better lane open. So I changed lanes to the better lane.

Even though he was now in front of me, he changed lanes to be in front of me and hold me behind him by braking maliciously. I sighed and rolled my eyes. (I really did.) it was apparent that he was desperately trying to start something with me. So, I signaled and changed lanes again, moving to the right, and got behind a car who had a semi truck in front of him. He changed lanes to get in front of the car, wedging himself between the semi truck and the car. I changed lanes, again, pretending i was getting off the freeway. He was unable to change lanes because there was a semi truck where he wanted to go. He executed a rapid two lane change in one fluid swerve to get back in the fast lane and accelerated to tail gate his next victim. And the last I saw of him, he had swerved back to the right, crossing two lanes, and was braking hard because he was behind an SUV.

People like that terrify me. I was still shaking when I got to work. I was thankful that I got to work safely. And I realized my worship music was still playing sweet accompaniment to the craziness as I parked. So, happy Friday to you and I’m glad it’s a happy Friday.

I’m thinking it may be awhile before I brave worship music again in the morning.

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Filed under I ♥ My Miata, Sometimes I Sleep, Spirituality

The Other Side of Bliss.

There was an accident outside our community tonight. It was a white mini-van and a small white pick-up truck. When I saw the white minivan, I held my breath without realizing it, praying without realizing it, that it wasn’t our next door neighbor. When we passed by and saw the woman on the stretcher, maybe it was bad, but I breathed a sigh of relief that it wasn’t a neighbor we knew and my prayer changed to one that she would be OK.

Someone ran a red light in front of me the other day. His light had been red for at least 5 seconds before he sailed through. The guy next to me was so angry about it that he blared his horn at the person. Too late, of course, the law breaker was far on down the road by that time. I was just thankful that I had been checking my son in his car seat and hadn’t gone when my light had turned green.

I finally received my disability payment today from the state. They pay that stuff by issuing a debit card now, which I guess is supposed to be all hip and cutting edge, which is what I thought at first. But then I realized, it’s kind of a pain in the rear for those who already have bank accounts that they like, because then you have to create yet another login and password, initiate a funds transfer, which then takes up to 2 business days to complete. Plus, the debit card is issued in an account with Bank of America, which is not a bonus to me since I absolutely loathe that bank.

I caught a cold from someone last week and have been praying that William doesn’t catch it. If he manages to somehow avoid getting it from his main provider of food who breathes on him, and can’t avoid coughing on him, it will truly be a miracle. But then he’s a miracle, so maybe it’s not that far fetched of a hope that he remain healthy? I took some Children’s benadryl to try and help with my cold symptoms, but am being very careful about what I take as I don’t want my milk supply to suffer. As a result, I’ve had a couple bouts of insomnia this past week. Apparently, I’m one of those people that benadryl, instead of making me sleepy, has the opposite effect. Let me tell you, it really sucks to lie in bed listening to my newborn baby cooing in his sleep from his co-sleeper, hearing the house creak around me, knowing the minutes and then hours are ticking by and that everyone in the house is asleep but me.

I guess I should be glad I didn’t have any other orifices that stuff could come out of, because my ears are crackling, my eyes are red, my nose is dripping, my mouth is coughing out stuff that shouldn’t see the light of day, my breasts leak milk, my southern area is still working on recovery… and that just about sums up how I’ve felt this week.

The other night, I was nursing William and my nose was dripping. Rather than drip on my son, I shoved a kleenex up the offending nostril and just sat there, defeated, while William ate in blissful oblivion. I must have been quite a sight, because my husband walked by and stared for a second, told me how sorry he was for me, and then started laughing. Five minutes later, my mom did the same exact thing. They both apologized for laughing at me, but honestly, I can’t blame them. In fact, I almost wish I had asked them to take a picture of it, because I’m all about recording the reality of the moment.

Anyway, I think I’m on the mend, or at least I hope I am. My husband thinks he may be catching some form of something and is trying desperately to find someone to blame it on, but since his symptoms in no way resemble mine, I’m not allowing him to lay it at my doorstep. So far William hasn’t caught it, thank God, and let’s continue to pray that he stays healthy and strong. Because let’s face it, I would rather be the one with insomnia and sick than for it to be the other way around!

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Filed under Gross Can Fascinate, I Worry A lot, Love/Loathe, Our Kid is Cute, Sometimes I Sleep

Weather Tricksters!

It was last Friday evening and I was gathering my stuff to go to the gym, debating in my mind whether I’d do an easy work out that night and a heavy work out in the morning, or just do a normal work out and wait until Saturday evening to go again.

Tony walked in the door and said, “It’s raining outside. They’re forecasting thunder and heavy rain for tonight.” I turned to him and replied flippantly, “Huh. Maybe we should go to the mountains…”

His eyes lit up and, a few phone calls later, miraculously, everything we were scheduled to do that weekend was able to be rescheduled and completed that Friday night.

You see, we never go to the mountains when it’s already raining (which means snow up there), but always when there’s snow in the forecast and then 99% of the time, it wimps out on us and we just go up and see dirty snow. Or no snow at all. Also known as sunshine at a higher elevation.

So it was that last Friday, it was raining heavily and halfway up our drive on the twisty mountain road, the rain that was loudly splattering on our windshield, turned to snow which gently, quietly settled for a moment before being whisked away by the windshield wipers. We were the ones making the noise at that point, shouting giddily at each other, “We tricked it! We tricked the weather!”

It was around 2am that we settled in the cabin and finally went to bed. We awakened the next morning to a world blanketed in white. I love fresh snow. When it lands in the night, it’s as if it makes nature pause — everything is so still and quiet. Before it’s touched by humans, the pure white, drifting mounds seem to go on and on. It’s so beautiful. This is the first snow we’ve seen this season, so we were reveling in the magical quality of it.

On our way to breakfast, we drove past our neighborhood donkey, she was contentedly under cover munching on her breakfast. The wicker couch on a porch, which not that long ago held a woman basking in the last rays of sunshine while reading a book, is now covered by a blue, plastic tarp. Dogs reveling in the snow were out with their humans who were alternately shoveling and laughing at their pet’s antics. People wearing snowshoes and winter clothing were briskly heading to mountain trails, replacing bicycles that were not long ago being idly pedaled down the road. Instead of people fishing alongside the bridge, birds were standing opportunistically in their place, waiting for the ice to break just enough…

Our favorite restaurant was pleasantly busy. One of the waitresses was just back from maternity leave, and it was so good to see her. We sat at the counter, as we usually do, and partook in the camaraderie that is such a part of the place.

While eating at the counter, the lady next to me took a phone call. In a low, discreet voice, she asked her caller a few questions and then left her seat for a more private spot. I asked her husband if she was a bail bond agent, he gave me an assessing look, and replied in the affirmative.

Knowing I have a magnetism for strangers telling me most anything and everything about themselves, I mentally shrugged and asked him what he did. He replied, “I’m a criminal lawyer, but I also do Federal Marshall work…” and the conversation continued on to discuss his work, his hopes for his future career, the economy, long-time restaurants in Los Angeles, and continued for another 15-20 minutes, when his wife returned to finish her meal, she joined in the conversation.

After we left, Tony said to me, “Did you find out if they’re on LinkedIn? Maybe you should network with them.” I blinked a couple times, laughed, and replied, “Nooooo?” I’m still trying to figure out if Tony thinks we’ll maybe need a bail bond agent and a criminal lawyer in our future?

After making our rounds in town, it was back to the cabin for movies and peaceful afternoon naps. Relaxing and rejuvenating.

Someone once made the statement that we move at such a fast pace in this world, we need to stop and let our soul catch up with our body.

That’s what the mountains do for us — the beauty and peace, devoid of everyday obligations, allows our souls to catch up with our bodies.

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Filed under I did something Special, I Left Home for Awhile, Life Encompasses Me, Sometimes I Sleep

Love & Loathe — 11/24/10 (early)

I find myself in an odd place this Thanksgiving. I had to take a couple days off from work to have a minor surgery, and my doctor has ordered me out of commission for the next few days to recover… which means I’m unable to attend dinner with the family tomorrow. I’ve given my slave husband orders to bring me home some turkey and stuffing. Really, out of all the bounty prepared, those are my favorite things of it all — turkey and stuffing. Not even the desserts compare. I know, you’re gasping in shock right now!

The meds they have me on make me quite sleepy, so my wish for naps and resting has been granted in a very big way. Which is why I’m writing now, because I may very well be sleeping tomorrow away. Huzzah!
How much of my yesterday was spent, note Tug’s possessive paw on my chin?

Since it’s Thanksgiving, instead of writing loves and loathes, I’ll just share some of the things that I’m thankful for this year.

* I’m incredibly thankful for having a wonderful husband in my life. He is sensitive, thoughtful, intuitive, responsive, responsible, loving and attentive. He makes me feel cared about, loved and safe, He is also prone to fits of goofyness, and his lack of self-consciousness is not only an inspiration to me, it’s also something that garners spontaneous laughter that just bubbles right out of my soul. I love this man that I’m married to so very much.

* My close friends. I’ve said it before, but it’s so very true: Having a support system in place is critical to get through the highs and lows of life. Isolating myself, even though that’s usually my natural instinct, is the exact wrong thing to do. For those of you who have offered words of wisdom, or support, or “just the right thing at the right time” — you are more appreciated by me than I could ever express.

* Having a job. Every day I wonder why I am where I am. I wonder why they seem to like me so much. I never, ever take for granted that I have somewhere to go every day and that I get a pay check. I do like my pay check. I always try to start the day like it’s a new job, that there will be new things to learn and expect the unexpected. When I have that attitude, I find it’s much easier to take the changes that seem to come at such a rapid fire pace.

* The basics of life. Having a home to live in with appliances that work, in a safe neighborhood, with (for the most part) great neighbors. Pets that are healthy and some that are working their way back to health. A car that is fun to drive and reliable. Beautiful plants in my back yard that I nurture and they, in return, give me so much joy.

* My health. This is something that I’ve not always had and I’m so pleased that, for the most part, I’m healthier than I’ve ever been in my life. I attribute it to two things — first, I found an exercise that I love to do. When I take my weekly day off from swimming, I miss it sooooo badly and can’t wait to get back in the pool the next day. Second, raw milk. Seriously. Unpasteurized milk has so many health benefits. (Link to read if interested.)

* Doctors that I respect and trust almost implicitly. I will never, ever stop asking questions, not after all I’ve been through with incompetent doctors, but the doctors I have now are either one step ahead of me and answer my questions before I ask them, or patiently answer my questions, and sometimes have changed the course of treatment to meet my requests… which means the respect is mutual. To finally have excellent doctors is a huge blessing.

* Fun socks. I know, this is so silly after all the Big, Serious, Deep things I’ve listed. But wearing fun or crazy socks under a conservative business suit is a fun little spot of happy in my day. Today? Cornucopias. Tomorrow? Turkeys.

With that, I wish each of you a very Happy Thanksgiving, filled with all the people and food that you love. If you’re in a part of the world where Thanksgiving isn’t celebrated tomorrow, I still wish you lots of food and time with loved ones.

Lots of love,
Jammie J.

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Filed under Health/Endo, I feel Glad, I have Family, I have Friends, Love/Loathe, Sometimes I Sleep

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