Category Archives: Hmmm…

Really.

… or things I learned in traffic court this morning:

* You don’t really have to be there by 8 AM, and the courtroom’s doors don’t really open at 8:30 AM.

* Interestingly, what time you check-in has nothing to do with when your name is called once inside the courtroom. Really.

* There are a lot of really strange people in this world and the judge and bailiff really have heard everything.

* People don’t dress decently when they go to court and they really should.

* If you don’t have the money to pay the fine, and you don’t think you can get the money to pay the fine for exceeding the speed limitation of your car (which really made me wonder what kind of car the dude had been driving), you will end up handcuffed and spending the next 4 days in jail, courtesy of American taxpayers.

* It is not advised to write an obscenity on your fine payment check. It is also not a good idea to laugh about it (whether from nerves or amusement) when the judge points it out. You will find yourself in contempt of court. Really not a good idea.

* If you pay your fee for traffic school, have three months to take care of it, and then “forget” or “get too busy” to go, and then appear in court a month after the deadline, you won’t get an extension and will be out the extra money you paid… and it will still go on your driving record.

* It is really worth it to go to traffic court if you are only paying the bail amount or if it’s a non-moving violation (cell phone ticket, etc.). The judge will knock a lot of money off your fine, and you can make payments!

* However, if you’re eligible for and want to go to traffic school, the only thing you can do is ask for an extension of time. The fee is mandated by the State of California, so the judge cannot adjust it and you cannot make payments.

That’s what I did this morning.

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Things That Make You Go “Hmmm.”

Seen in the shower room at my gym last week. I guess instead of singing in the shower, people were cussing? Oddly, the sign disappeared after a couple days. So apparently people’s language got cleaned up along with their bodies.

The stopper in my bathroom sink was crooked last night, so I moved it gently to straighten it, but it popped out in my hand… along with a huge wad of stuff. I’m thinking that might be the reason my sink hasn’t ever drained properly since the day I moved into this joint? May also be why Drano never worked?

I have three reusable bags that I take to the grocery store or Walmart or wherever I shop. (They’re called “green bags”, but only one of my bags is actually green in color, the other two are black.) Sometimes, though, I forget to bring them in and am always shocked at just how thin the plastic bags the stores provide are these days. i remember when Walmart’s bags used to be that aqua blue color. Do you remember those? It really wasn’t that long ago. Those bags were nearly indestructible compared to today’s bags.

Yesteryear’s bags…

Dear Husband, please don’t ever let me buy a zipper bra…

…or do this to remove a stain from any of our remaining carpet… Love, Wife

And this last one may be a little mean-spirited of me, although I really don’t intend to be. It’s just that… well, when I was a teenager, I really, really wanted to be a model. I went to modeling school and everything, but I never really thought I was pretty enough and then… life just kind of happened, you know? So last month I got my Metrostyle catalog and I glanced through it, as I’m wont to do. It is a catalog, after all. There was a pretty enough blonde girl on the cover and as I flipped through the pages, I noted that they used her quite a bit, even more than the other models. In several of the shots, she had her mouth open. Why modeling clothes requires opening of the mouth is beyond me, but it was just one of those moments for me that I wondered why I ever doubted myself. My teeth aren’t perfectly straight by any stretch of the imagination, and I’ll be the first to say that sometimes a gap in the front two teeth can be a little sexy in an imperfect way, you know? But, just, wow, if she can make it, surely I could’ve made it.
See? Pretty girl, huh?


But why, oh why, must models and actresses open their mouths?

It’s truly a bit more shocking when seeing the larger pictures rather than these little thumbnails…

And that’s it for this edition of Things That Make You Go “Hmmmm.”

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