Oh my Goodness!

A lady came into the doctor’s office, trailed by her two tow-headed daughters. The oldest, about 5, the younger one about 3 1/2. The lady checked-in and her two girls squiggled up and shared a chair in the waiting room. Their eyes promptly turned toward the TV in the corner that perpetually plays “health” videos. On it, a video of a man getting oral surgery was playing, his head tilted back at an awkward angle (as if there’s a non-awkward angle in the dentist chair), blood on the protective paper surrounding his face. The oldest girl said, in a concerned voice, “Oh my gosh, oh my goodness… look…” She nudged her sister, and then in tandem, they both started repeating to each other and the room in general, “Oh my goodness, oh my gosh, oh my goodness…” Their mom sat down next to them. The video changed to show a line of kids about their age brushing their teeth, and the oldest summarized what she had seen to her mom, “That poor man didn’t brush his teeth and look what happened to him…” Everyone in the waiting room, and the receptionist, was wearing a smirk for the next 5 minutes.

We attended the U2 concert in Anaheim this past Friday night. It was a good show — of course it was. They are one of the few bands one can expect to deliver a good show, and they always meet the expectations. We’ve had the tickets for this concert for over two years (it was supposed to be last year, but Bono had emergency back surgery instead). We saw them back in 2009 at the Rose Bowl, and this venue was much more convenient for us. Plus, we attended with two of our favorite people.

People watching at concerts is always something to behold and this event was no exception. We had the Butt Crack Massager guy in front of us, whose hand kept creeping up and down his woman’s butt crack. Then we had the guy behind us who brought his kid, who fell asleep mid-concert. And the Worshiper, who was sooooo into the concert that he had his hands raised to the sky the entire time, even when there was no music. And, finally, we had the two young women who were sitting in front of us who we dubbed the “Hair Swishers.” The one was such a passionate hair swisher (she swished her hair every 30 seconds, minimum) that she banged the back of her head on my knee during one attempted swish. Oh my gosh, oh my goodness was the litany going through my head. Tony didn’t realize how swishy she was until they switched seats after a beer run and the swisher sat in front of him. Even he started to get annoyed, and his patience level is MUCH higher than mine is. Now THAT was funny to watch.

The Butt Crack Massager guy

Kid sleeping

Dude with hands in the air, always

Hair swishers. Ugh.

Yesterday we had another Duck Park Date. I found a loaf of bread for $.35 at Ralphs this past week and I immediately put “Duck Park Date” on our calendar. We were relieved to arrive at the park and find that we were practically the only people there! No fights, hooray! So we’re sitting there eating our frozen yogurt, and all of a sudden there’s a HUGE ruckus. Two geese started fighting across the pond. One of them grabbed the other’s neck and pushed him into the water. Feathers were flying, heads were being dunked, wings were flapping, and the honking! Oh my goodness, the noise! This was serious. I looked at Tony and said, “Whoa. Those girls that were fighting a couple weeks ago could take lessons from these birds!” And then we went over to try and break up the goose fight. Turns out, the dominant bird was a Papa protecting the Mama and their nest of 6 little babies. Have to say, that is something worth fighting about.

Then some idiot let his dog off the leash and the dog promptly went tromping into the flowers where the bird’s nest was. Mama Goose had a lot to say about that… I’ve seen dogs move pretty fast, but that dog? With Mama Goose on his tail? Oh, he moved… and it took her about 10 minutes before she was settled down enough to entrust Papa Goose with guard duty again and go back to her nest tending duties.

Do you see Mama Goose settling back down in the flowers?

Oh my gosh, oh my goodness!



Filed under Entertainment can be Cheap, Entertainment can be Expensive

14 responses to “Oh my Goodness!

  1. Grace

    hehehe. kids are funny.

    hey, you didn’t go to the concert with us! who’d you go with? πŸ˜› hehe.

    it was a good concert, for sure. i had the most disgusting couple making out most of the time. and the girl was so heavy that i could feel her jumping up and down, even when she was the only one doing it. yikes. i thought i was gonna die out there. hehe.

    • I thought the mom would be upset that something so gory was on TV. But she just rolled with it, which made it even funnier to me. hehe

      Oh, you’ve met them. You even had your picture taken with the girl. hehe

      People are so gross, GET A ROOM WEIRDOS! Speaking of feeling the jumps people did, when I went the restroom I could totally feel the upper part of the balcony swaying. It was kind of creepy.

  2. That’s the best way to teach young kids good habits, scare the shit out of them. Sort of like the anti-smoking ads on TV here that show people getting operated on with lung cancer and such.

    You know, if your woman has a nice ass, why not enjoy it? Glad you still enjoyed the concert despite the “distractions”.

    • The scare factor is definitely one learning tool that is effective on vulnerable minds. heh

      Umm, dude? That woman did NOT have a nice ass. Apparently he thought so, but the rest of us behind them were just grossed out.

  3. last weekend we went out on he lake with a bunch of friends, we found a gaggle of geese swimming in a cove and the girls jumped in and then we threw food at them until they were surrounded by geese. The kids loved it ! probably wasn’t the safest thing to do…

  4. PY

    Dear Jammie, you have a keen way to observe life. The Duck Park date sounds interesting to me especially. Have a blessed week.

  5. Cat

    I used to enjoy the simple things so much, like you do. Lately I have had so much negativity and rage inside me it’s been easy to forget to step back and remember that.

    I need a Duck Park Date in my life very soon.

  6. Caryl

    hair swishers, eh? Had one come late into church one time. Along with her chatting to her friend, it really was distracting.
    Any estimate on the crowd size at the concert?
    Love you,

  7. julie

    too cute! ALL OF IT! πŸ™‚